Ditch Your Old Expectations

This month I’m participating in the A to Z Challenge, blogging every day of the month of April, except Sundays, on a topic from A to Z. I’m posting short-form topics meant to get you talking and sharing! Join the discussion in the comments.

I’m reading a book called Better Than Perfect by Elizabeth Lombardo. It’s about perfectionism and how to get over it. Lombardo suggests, as part of getting rid of perfectionism, that you examine the expectations you have of yourself.

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As soon as I began to do this, I realized that I have some giant expectations that are moldy leftovers from when I was a kid. I had clear ideas about how things were going to be and by when.

Except, now I’m older, and things are not that way, and I’ve been holding a grudge against myself for not living up to my kid expectations. Except, those kid expectations were all out of proportion to what I could have done with the knowledge and ability I had at any given point in my life.

Do you have old expectations you’re holding onto? Do you have leftover dreams and goals that you weren’t able to meet that you still hold over your own head?

Today, forgive yourself. Stop holding that grudge. Stop holding those things over your own head. Look forward, at what you’re going to do next, at what you know you can do next, and don’t let those old standards trip you up and hold you back. You do not have to have that whole world on your shoulders.

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I was not a famous, rich author by the time I was in my 20s. I am deep into my 30s and I am still not a famous, rich author. I am only self-publishing my first book now. But that’s okay, because that’s the time I needed. It’s okay, because the expectations I had for myself as a teenager were unrealistic in terms of what I could actually do.

Share with us — what old expectations are you forgiving yourself for not meeting?

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